


Desire & Disaster

by shanabanana265



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Ben Solo as a grumpy teenager, F/M, Seret Jedi Relationship?
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-04
Updated: 2020-05-07
Packaged: 2021-03-03 02:47:20
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,963
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24007597
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shanabanana265/pseuds/shanabanana265
Summary: “The babe...she’s strong with the Force. She’ll have the power to either save the galaxy...or destroy it.”___________________________________________________________________________________________________Kylo Ren isn't the last Jedi..not like everyone in the galaxy thinks. But she's a complicated part of his past and he intends to leave it like that...in the past.
Relationships: Ben Solo/Original Character(s), Ben Solo/Original Female Character(s), Kylo Ren/Original Female Character(s)
Comments: 4
Kudos: 3





	1. Five Years Apart

**Author's Note:**

> This is Kylo/Ben & OFC with complicated pre-TFA drama that impacts the events of the movies.

“The babe...she’s strong with the Force. She’ll have the power to either save the galaxy...or destroy it.” The man said, holding the infant in his arms. It had been only a few hours since he’d found her, since he’d saved her. He could feel the power within her...and part of him knew what was coming. 

“Her mother is dead. She has no family, no one to sway her to the right side,” the woman next to him answered. She’d been with her brother when he’d found the baby and they’d immediately taken him to Maz Kanata and a handful of other Force sensitives who they hoped would keep the child safe. 

“I’ll do it,” the second woman said softly, looking around the table. She’d always wanted a family of her own and this little girl needed someone to protect her, to fight for her, to be on her side. “I’ll keep her and we’ll do right by her…to keep her on our side.”

——————

Looking in the mirror made Cala sigh. She didn’t know what made her look more tired, her red rimmed eyes or the bags underneath them. 

She looked like it had been about three days since she slept. Which was probably about right. 

At first, she’d suffered from nightmares. Memories, twisted reimagining, or even visions of a potential future. But after the first year, it had shifted into insomnia. She just...couldn’t shut her brain off. Sometimes her thoughts were worse than the nightmares. 

She cleaned herself up, put on a fresh tunic and leggings, and redid the braids in her hair. Good enough. 

0624\. Might as well head to breakfast. 

As soon as the blonde woman walked into the cantina, all conversation stopped. Originally, they’d gone quiet out of distrust. A Jedi...who survived the massacre at the temple? But five years with the Resistance had proved her value to them. This was something else. 

They were hiding something from her. Something they often did in an effort to protect her, but she wasn’t made of glass. 

“You might as well tell me what happened, General. Your face says it was something bad,” she stated as she joined them at the table with her tray. Still, the group exchanged another look, so she continued. “I’m not fragile. You won’t break me. Tell me.”

It was Lieutenant Kaydel Connix who spoke first, ignoring the hesitance in General Leia Organa’s eyes. “Poe is MIA. They...um...they found them on Jakku. The village was burned and his ship destroyed.”

“Any survivors?” Cala asked quietly. 

She shook her head. “They didn’t find his body, though. Or BB-8.”

“He was there.” It wasn’t a question. Cala’s eyes shifted down to her shaking hands where she continued to play with her fork, not really eating. She didn’t eat much nowadays. She was better than she’d been years ago, when she’d first arrived. There was a period where her friends made her. It wasn’t like that anymore, but she felt stressed and stagnant hiding out on base from...

“We’re assuming so,” Leia stated, finally speaking up and interrupting Cala’s thoughts. Even though she’d already known the answer, she flinched. They always tried to protect her from news of him. Now their silence made sense.

“Then he has Poe and we need to get him back. I know how his mind works, Leia. He has him.”

The General shook her head. “You’re not going, Cala. It’s too dangerous.” She halted the younger woman’s protest with a lift of her hand. “You know why we can’t let you.”

“He’ll distract me,” she answers, her tone monotonous as she repeats the words she’s heard a hundred times. “He’ll take me prisoner. He’ll try to turn me to the dark side.” She nervously played with the hem of her tunic. “I’m the best fighting chance we have at stopping him.”

“From here.” Leia answered. “We need you safe. We’ll never get him back if we lose you too.”

Her hand shifted to her lightsaber and she sighed. “He wouldn’t hurt me.”

“No. That’s an order. We don’t know what he’ll do, not anymore. Even if he is still your husb—.”

“Don’t,” the blonde Jedi snapped. “Don’t say it.”

Her husband. The one who’d left her in the ruins of the Jedi temple, surrounded by the bodies of their friends. 

—————-

The comm channel was full of static. Cala only hoped that using Leia Organa Solo’s personal code would work, that she’d be patched through to the resistance. 

“Ben?” Was the voice that came through first. 

“No...” 

“Who is this?” Came the sharp reply. “How did you get this code?”

“A friend,” was Cala’s reply. Even to her, her voice sounded weak. “I’m a Jedi Knight.”

“The Jedi temple was just massacred.” Pain ran through the female voice on the other end. 

“I know. I was there. Ben told me how to find you.” There’s a pause before she continued. “I...I’m injured. Pretty badly. I’m in the atmosphere, just not sure I’ll stay conscious through the landing.” 

“Go ahead and land. I’ll meet you at the hangar with a medic. We’ll decide what to do then.”

Cala was grateful the ship was on autopilot. She stayed conscious, but she was too shaky and the world was too fuzzy for her to land the ship properly. The opening of the hatch brought her back to awareness and she looked into the worried eyes of Leia Organa. Eyes that looked just like her son’s. Naturally, that made her eyes fill with tears.

They got her out and onto a stretcher. Looking her over, confusion crossed Leia’s face. “I just see bruises, cuts and scrapes...Where is all the blood....” The look in Cala’s eyes caused understanding to dawn in Leia’s. “Oh.” The older woman raised her hand to a medic.

A needle entered her arm and the world went dark. Cala was grateful. Her head was aching and the cramps in her abdomen had only gotten worse since she’d left the temple. 

When she woke for the second time, the sun was blaring through the blinds in what could only be an infirmary. She felt groggy and there was still an IV in her arm. She attempted to sit up, confused, but a hand rested on her shoulder. 

“Relax. Your body has been through enough,” came the soft voice of the General. “I’m Leia, by the way.”

“Cala,” she said in response, voice hoarse. “Cala Quinn...Solo.”

“You’re Ben’s...wife? That’s how you had his comm unit.” Shock crossed Leia’s face. “He never...told us.”

“We agreed not to. Jedi aren’t allowed. It’s...it hasn’t been very long. A few weeks.” She sighed. “I returned from my trials yesterday afternoon. We planned to leave this morning to come tell you. Well, I told him he didn’t have a choice, you needed to know.” 

“And the baby was his,” she said gently, her face unreadable. She gently touched the other woman’s hair. “I would assume these Alderaanian braids are his doing as well.”

“Yeah.” Cala nodded, biting her lip to keep it from quivering. “He refused to tell me how. Said he liked braiding my hair for me. He’s done it for....” she took a breath. “Years.”

“How could he do this? To you...to the baby.”

“He didn’t...he didn’t know.” Tears filled her eyes. She felt dusty and dirty and sore...and exhausted. Mentally, physically, and emotionally. But she fought the tears. “I hadn’t had the chance to tell him yet.”

“Be strong tomorrow,” Leia said, touching her newfound daughter-in-law on the cheek. “Today, you lost your husband and your child. Tomorrow, you can be strong and we’ll find a way to get him back. But mourn your losses for today.”

Cala nodded again, the tears breaking through to slide down her cheeks. “We need...we need to get my mom off of Coruscant. He knows where she is. I can’t...I can’t leave here there.”

Leia carefully sat beside her and held her while she cried. “I’ll send a ship. You focus on recovering.”

—————-

Leia squeezed Cala’s hand, bringing her back to the present. “We’ll get Poe back. And recover the droid. But if my son is actively involved in this mission, it’s far too dangerous for me to let you go.”

She sighed, slumping in her seat. “I know. It’s just so hard for me to sit back and hide. He’s out there and he’s hurting my friends and...and I can’t /feel/ him anymore.” He’d shut her out, nearly completely, and she was now unable to sense his mind or his presence in the force. What had once been a constant presence in the back of her mind was now gone. Empty. “I’m so sick of hiding, Leia.”

Ben Solo had been in her head for thirteen years. And when she woke up in the rubble of his hut five years ago, he was gone. Physically. But he had also fractured the bond that they’d always been told was unbreakable.

“And none of that is any different than when you came to me five years ago. Breathe. Meditate. Push that anger and fear and hurt away. Cala, you can’t let it control you or we’ll lose you too.” For five years, it had been a constant fear of losing her to the dark side. Her grief had been so deep that they’d worried someday she’d lose control. The light in her was stronger now, that’s true. But the sadness was overwhelming sometimes. 

After several deep breaths to push away the emotions inside her and gain control, the younger woman nodded. “Back then, it seemed so easy. Break through his mind, appeal to his emotions, get him to turn on Snoke. But I hit a wall every time. Even when he sleeps.”

Leia kept her voice calm, Cala had a tendency to lose her temper when it came to discussing...Kylo Ren. She’d always had a temper, even before she lost Ben. She couldn’t feel him or sense him, but occasionally echoes of his rage leeched through to effect her. Even if his estranged wife didn’t quite realize it. “And that is a good thing. He is so terrified of you influencing him that he spends energy every single second to keep you away from his mind.”

“We need to focus on Poe.” Cala said softly, continuing to breath deeply. “I’d send a single ship to Jakku. You’ll largely escape notice. Bring back Poe or BB-8...or whatever managed to escape the First Order. Twenty four hours. And I’m going in to get him. You won’t be able to stop me.”

Leia nodded to Lieutenant Kaydel Connix, Cala’s closest friend other than Poe, and she stood, leaving the room quickly. “General...” Leia started. 

“We’ve talked about this,” Cala snapped. “Being a Jedi doesn’t give me the right to be a General. They’re gone. We don’t have to follow their ways anymore.”

Leia touched her shoulder. “Cool your temper, Cala, and you’d be a wonderful General.”

Cala stood quickly. “I’m going to see my mother.” She followed Kaydel from the room. 

She needed to calm down. Right now.


	2. Denying the Truth

Kylo Ren was furious and tired. It had been a long day and here he was...on Jakku. 

It was hot, full of sand, and he wasn’t any closer to finding Luke Skywalker. 

He approached the figure from his past and Lor San Tekka looked at him, unafraid. “Look how old you’ve become.” The mask covering his face distorted his voice. 

“Something far worse has happened to you,” the old man says.

“You know what I’ve come for,” Kylo says, cutting right to the chase. 

“I know where you come from. Before you called yourself Kylo Ren.” The old man did not look afraid of him and that made him angrier.

Now he was getting annoyed. His tone was sharper as he continued. “The map to Skywalker. We know you’ve found it and now you’re going to give it to the First Order.”

“The First Order rose from the dark side. You did not.” Kylo did not want to be reminded of his past. He wanted to let his past die, forgotten, back where it belonged. 

“I’ll show you the dark side,” he hissed, the threat obvious in his tone.

“You may try,” San Tekka continued. “But you cannot deny the truth that is your family. And what you left behind.”

“You’re so right.” The man in the mask was filled with rage and he struck the other man down with his lightsaber. HIs family was the one thing he did not want to think about.

There was the hum of a blaster and he quickly stopped the resistance pilot from shooting him with a blaster. The stormtroopers brought the man to his knees in front of him. He had dark curly hair. Poe Dameron. He’d known the man, years ago, but he was unsure if he knew who he had once been. It didn’t matter. That person was dead.

“Who talks first? You talk first?” He joked, but Kylo was not amused. 

“The old man gave it to you.”

“It’s very hard to understand you with all the…”

“Search him. Put him on board,” Kylo said, interrupting the man.

“Sir,” his loyal captain interrupted. “The villagers.”

“Kill them all,” Kylo said without emotion before boarding the ship.

He’d let the stormtroopers and Hux have a crack at finding the map from Poe Dameron. 

And if that failed, well, he’d retrieve the information from his mind himself. 

When he next saw the pilot, he was beaten and bloody, but hadn’t given any information away. He was reluctantly impressed. He’d seen Hux at work and the General had impressive ideas for extracting information. 

Poe’s battered lips twitched as Kylo entered the room, mask covering his face. 

“I had no idea we had the best pilot in the resistance on board. Comfortable?”

“Not really,” he replied, spitting a mouthful of blood out. 

“I’m impressed. No one has been able to get out of you what you did with the map.”

“Might want to rethink your technique.”

Kylo said nothing, reaching out to the pilot. Poe’s face twisted in pain, but he stayed silent. 

“Where is it?” The former Jedi emphasized. 

“The resistance will not be intimidated by you.”

“Where is it?” He repeated, hand still reaching toward him. 

Poe couldn’t take it anymore, letting out a scream of agony as the other man entered his mind. 

Kylo received flashes, Poe putting the map inside a small droid, the droid whizzing off into the darkness of Jakku. But then something changed. The pilot took control over the flashes.

He was in a small room with a window, a single bed, and a storage chest, likely for clothing. There were two doors along one wall. A very familiar blonde woman was standing near that window and looked back at...him?

No, not him. Dameron. 

Cala was skinny...well, skinnier than the last time he’d seen her. Dark circles surrounded her eyes and her skin was pale. 

“Cal....” Dameron’s voice cut through. 

“It’s Cala,” she corrected, visibly flinching at the old nickname. His nickname. “And I’ve heard it all before. I know they’re scared of me. Because of my power and my temper. But I’m not going to hurt anyone.”

“You still wake up screaming,” Dameron replies. “And things fall off walls when you get angry. But they’ll get used to you. Give them time.”

“You don’t get it. You’re their precious pilot. They adore you.” She sighed. “They don’t trust me because of him. And that’s not my fault!” A picture on the wall swung away and then banged back against it.

His girl always did have an impressive temper. Enough. She’s not his girl anymore.

“Leia wants to help you control it,” the man said softly. “If you can control your anger, no one will fear you. You’ll prove yourself on merit alone.”

Kylo pulled himself out of the pilot’s mind, shocked. His wife was with his mother. And this man had just taken control to show him that. Without another word, he left the interrogation room. General Hux gave him a questioning look. 

“It’s in a droid. A BB unit.”

“If it’s on Jakku, then we’ll find it,” the red haired man replied. 

“I leave you to it.” He swept away, cape swinging behind him. And went straight to his training room. He needed to hit something. 

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. 

How could the pilot get the drop on him? He’d been in his mind, he’d seen the information he wanted. And Dameron had still won. 

Because he knew. He knew about her. 

Cala was Kylo Ren’s best kept secret. No one had known about her. Not Luke, not the Knights of Ren. He’d even managed to keep it from Snoke. 

And she’d told the pilot. His mother too. 

But she had looked nothing like the woman who had been his equal and his rival since she was ten years old. 

She was tired, she was sad, and she was lost.

——————

Cala Quinn was the newest student at the Jedi temple. This made her the third. 

She was two years younger than Ben and six months older than Tiberius. 

And she was a girl. 

It took him three days to start calling her Cal instead, to tell her she was just one of the boys, but she’d never be as strong as him or Ty in spite of that.

She’d broken his nose. 

Luke had tried to use it as a lesson, to show Cala how to heal, but the ten year old was stubborn. She said he’d deserved it. 

He probably did. 

But she was blonde and she was fierce and she had the cutest little nose. He couldn’t resist the urge to taunt her. 

Master Luke refused to let them spar each other. One or the other usually ended up with broken bones or cuts or bruises. They were both allowed to fight with Ty, but not each other. 

But he dreamed of her and she of him. 

It took six months for Luke to discover that the pair was bonded. That somehow the force had linked them together. 

At first, it didn’t worry him. It was harmless, maybe it would make the pair hate each other less. 

They still bickered endlessly. But Cala understood his loneliness, the way he felt abandoned. And he understood the darkness she struggled to repress. 

He still called her Cal. She didn’t hate it so much once she got older.

And they were a hell of a team during simulations. They never spoke, but worked flawlessly as a unit. 

But then...things changed and suddenly it wasn’t so harmless. 

“Yield,” Cala said, pressing her wooden sword to Ben’s throat. 

In a show of the Force, seventeen year old Ben Solo tripped her, leaning over her to press his own sword to her chest. “You yield.”

With a wave of her hand, she pulled him down beside her and rolled over to straddled his stomach. “Not a chance, Solo.”

And then he leaned up to kiss her. 

It wasn’t until Luke ran into the arena that the pair remembered they’d been demonstrating for the younglings. 

“This ends now,” he said calmly, though his stress was visible in his eyes. “Sever the bond.”

“We don’t know how to do that, Master,” Cala argued, crossing her arms over her chest. 

“I have the Jedi texts. The answer is likely there somewhere. You’ll both research it,” he said with a sigh. “But block each other until we find it. Emotional attachments are too dangerous for Jedi. I won’t lose you both to the dark.”

Ben went to protest, but closed his mouth when Cala nodded obediently. 

“We’re not doing that, Cal,” he murmured through the bond. 

“Shhh,” she replied. “We’ll talk about this later.”

He frowned but went quiet, murmuring his ascent to Luke. 

After that day, no one saw the two of them together as anything more than peers. Not Luke, not the students. 

Most of their interactions were through the bond, just to keep their growing feelings a secret.

But they didn’t stop the occasional kissing.

——————

With his lightsaber, he severed the head off of the droid. Then he buried his face in his hands, gritting his teeth. 

He was Kylo Ren. He had no weaknesses. He didn’t need anybody. 

He just…

Fine.

He missed his fucking wife.


	3. To Have and to Hold

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Cute wedding flashback, anyone?

Poppy Quinn had blue hair. She had for Cala’s entire life. It used to be long, nearly to her waist, and her daughter had once played with it while listening to her bedtime stories. 

When she was a little, it was her mother who kept her safe. From the nightmares and the voices in her head. She’d taken in the unwanted baby when no one else had. She’d protected her and nurtured her for her entire life. 

It had only been the two of them, for as long as Cala could remember. They were a team, the best of friends, and Cala told her mother everything. 

Even after she went to school, when Ben Solo became the person who wiped away her tears and woke her from bad dreams, she’d always stayed close to her mother. 

“Hello, my darling,” she said sweetly as Cala entered the room, hugging her daughter close. “Leia sent you?” 

She shrugged. “I sent myself. But she probably wasn’t far from it. I’ve been in a mood since hearing about Poe.”

Poppy brushed a strand of her daughter’s hair behind her ear. “I have something for you. Something that might help when the darkness creeps in and you need a little reminder of why we’re doing this.”

Cala looked hesitant, biting her lip. “Should I be scared?”

Poppy laughed and shook her head, pulling away from her daughter to grab a holo that was taped to the back of her dresser. 

Cala’s breath caught when she saw it. 

It was her wedding day and Ben was holding her against his chest, his hand on the back of her head. Her hair had been done in the traditional Alderaanian wedding braids. Ben had done it, of course. She hadn’t learned to braid until Leia taught her a few years ago.

Her hand was on his arm, the light catching the silver and black glint of the ring on her finger. 

And he loved her. It was visible on his face, in the way he held her. 

“W-where did you get this?” Cala tried to contain the quiver in her voice, fairly unsuccessfully. 

“I took it,” she said simply. “But you weren’t ready to see it at the time.”

Poppy Quinn was the only person who had known her daughter and Ben Solo as man and wife. 

—————

It was raining when the pair landed on Coruscant. 

Cala was giggling and Ben was grumpy, no surprise there. She loved the smell of the rain and the way they were the only people around. “Makes it more romantic,” she argued, sliding her fingers to intertwine with his. 

“I don’t know why we’re doing this,” was his reply but he squeezed her hand affectionately. “You’ve been mine since you were sixteen years old.”

The blonde rolled her eyes, shaking her head in a good-natured way at her partner. “Ben, we talked about this. The Force recognizes that you’re the other half of my soul, but that doesn’t mean we can’t make it legal. That’s what I want and every second you stand here and argue with me is a second you get even wetter.”

They always fought like this. Bickered. They had since they were kids. Neither of them could resist the urge to press the other’s buttons.

He half-smiled and pulled her against him, kissing her forehead. “If it’ll make you happy, Cal.”

“Good.” She grinned and tugged him down a side street. “Mom’s is this way.”

Poppy took one look at the pair before ushering them inside. She immediately hugged her daughter tightly, not caring about how wet she was. “The prodigal daughter returns,” she said warmly, which made her daughter groan. 

“Mom! Stop.” Cala’s cheeks flushed with embarrassment. “This is Ben.”

Ben stiffened when her mother hugged him too, but did not push her away. Then Poppy stepped back and examined the pair curiously. 

“Oh dear,” she said softly. “You are bonded.” She flicked her tongue, pausing for a moment. “It’s not a bond but a dyad. Two that are one.” She tilted her head at them. “Interesting. Such a phenomenon is rarely found outside of Twins.”

“Luke hates it,” Cala confessed. “He’s pushed us apart, tried to convince us to break it.”

“Impossible,” she said with a grin. “Very much impossible.”

“How do you know this anyway?” Ben spoke up. 

“She can’t manipulate the Force, not like we can. But she senses it, feels it, it talks to her. She’s way older than she looks, trust me.” Poppy tossed a pillow in indignation at her daughter, who laughed. “Mom, we’re not here for that. We know about the bond. We want to get married.”

The older woman smiled. “I knew this moment would someday come.” She walked to an old desk, pressing a button on the side that revealed a hidden compartment. From it, she withdrew a small leather pouch. “Go change into dry clothes, I’ll gather what we need.”

Fifteen minutes later, the pair was kneeling on the floor in front of Poppy as she tied a ribbon around their hands. 

“Isn’t it kind of blasphemy to swear to love one another over one of the old Jedi texts?” Cala quipped, earning a smile from Ben and a smack with said book from her mother. 

“It’s what we have, child, and you’ll appreciate it.” She cleared her throat before continuing. “Today, we are gathered for a binding of souls. Souls that are already intricately, unbreakably bound. But today we bind them in truth.”

Poppy tightened the knot around their wrists, smiling as she placed the book on the table between them. “Place your hand on the book, Cala, and repeat after me. I, Calamity Quinn, take Ben Solo...”

Cala cleared her throat, eyes on his face. “I, Calamity Quinn, take Ben Solo...”

“To be my husband, my partner, my other half.”

“To be my husband, my partner, and my other half,” she continued. 

“Through sickness and health, through light and darkness, together we will be.”

Ben’s emotions flickered through the bond and she smiled at him. “Through sickness and health, through light and darkness, together we will be.”

Poppy walked Ben through the same lines before untying the ribbon around their wrists. “These rings are a symbol of the devotion made here today.” She pulled one from the leather pouch she’d gotten earlier and handed it to Ben, who slid it on Cala’s finger. It was silver and black and the two strands were intertwined with each other. After Cala had done the same to Ben, Poppy smiled. “Now and forever, you are bound as man and wife. Kiss your bride.”

And then Ben’s lips were on hers and she could feel the darkness within him dissipate. He broke the kiss and pulled her close, just holding her for a moment. 

When they finally pulled away, her mother was grinning. “I’ll be back in the morning. Don’t make me any grandbabies just yet.” 

Cala turned bright red. “Mom! We can stay on the ship.”

She shook her head and kissed her daughter on the cheek. “Not tonight, you won’t. Enjoy your husband.”

As soon as the door shut behind Poppy, Ben’s arms wrapped around his new wife and he hoisted her up. “We’ve talked about this, Solo,” she said with a laugh. “I don’t need you to carry me around. Self-sufficient and all that.”

“I do what I want, Solo.” He laughed too, nuzzling her cheek with his nose. “So....Calamity, huh?”

“Oh shut up,” she said with a grin, sliding her fingers into his hair. “You’d better not tell anyone. There’s a reason you didn’t know.”

“What are you going to do, break my nose? Again?” He pressed his lips to her jaw, breathing in the scent of her. 

“You gave a preteen girl a boy’s nickname!” She said with a laugh. 

“Damn right I did, Cal.” He said as he pressed her into the wall of the hallway. “It was far less intimidating if your rival wasn’t a girl. But I have got to say...I love the dress.” His hands slid up her thigh and she grinned at him. The dress was simple, a sundress, but in the traditional pastel blue wedding colors of Alderaan. 

“You just like that you have full access to everything underneath the dress,” she teased, reaching behind her to open the door to her childhood bedroom. 

She could feel his satisfaction, his contentment through their bond. And he could feel her happiness. 

“I knew you were a real girl once,” was all he said as he pressed his lips along her neck to her shoulder. She had her eyes closed and was confused momentarily. Ah, right. Everything in the room was pink. 

She went to retort, but he sunk his teeth into her neck and she gasped instead. 

He carefully set her on the ground. “Hold still,” he said, his voice gruff as he began to undo the tie on her dress. 

She pouted. “You’re always so bossy.” But she held still and let him be the one to remove the layer of gauzy fabric from her body. “Can I move yet?” She said impatiently. 

“No, sweet.” he took a step back and watched her for a moment. “I just want to look at you, just for a second.”

“You’ve seen me naked, Ben. Several times.”

He pressed his lips to her forehead. “I know. But this...this is the time I want to commit to memory. My wife, with her hair in that braid, my ring on her finger...naked. In front of a bed that’s definitely not going to fit both of us.”

“Good thing I wasn’t really planning on sleeping much then, huh?” She said as she reached over to tug his shirt over his head. 

He growled and picked her back up, nuzzling his nose into the crook of her neck. “I’m really glad I didn’t know you were naked under that dress the entire time.”

She laughed, squirming in his arms before letting out a whimper when it pressed her more firmly against him. “Ben...”

“I know, sweet, I know.” He laid her down on the bed before climbing up after her. 

“Pants,” she said, tracing the muscles on his chest with her fingertips. 

“Now who is bossy?” He said with a chuckle, but kicked them off obediently. 

Her hand gripped his hip and used that to pull him down onto her as she kissed him deeply. He reached between them to run his fingers through her folds before sliding one inside her. 

“Ben,” she whined through the bond. 

His lips were pressed to her neck and he nipped gently. Since his mouth was otherwise occupied, he also replied mentally. “Relax, Cal. I’ve got you.”

She squirmed impatiently, unable to keep her hips still as he thrust his finger inside her. “Tease me later, Ben. I need you. Please.” She murmured into his mind, accompanied by mental pictures of him doing just that.

He groaned, moving to lick his finger clean. He pressed his hips to hers, rubbing his hand down her thigh as he kissed her deeply. 

She obeyed his silent command, wrapping her legs around his waist and rocking against him. He ran his cock through the wetness between her legs and then he was inside her, causing her to cry out. 

It was almost overwhelming, feeling her own pleasure from him thrusting inside her and sensing his through their bond. But it was always like that with Ben. 

Their eyes met and she smiled, running her hands up his back before leaning in to kiss him again. She was close already and he pulled back, his movements shallow enough to pull her back from the brink. She gave him an impatient look and he chuckled, kissing her nose. “You can be the boss next time,” he said sweetly. 

She rolled her eyes, leaning in to tug his lower lip between his teeth. He took advantage of her distraction to slam deep inside her, causing them both to groan. He repeated the motion, pulling all the way out before sliding all the way back in, several times. Then he pressed his fingers to her clit as he did it, causing her to come apart around him. It took him a few more thrusts before he came inside her and collapsed on her, panting. 

She rubbed his back again, kissing his sweaty forehead. “I love you.”

“I love you too.” He gave her his happy grin, resting his head on her chest as they caught their breath. “Five more weeks. Then you take your trials, we don’t have to hide this anymore, and we can leave the temple...together.”

She smiled back at him. “First thing though...we’re telling your family.”

“We’ll see.” He made a face and kissed her shoulder gently. “Get some sleep. Because I’m going to wake you in a few hours and we’ll do it all again. In your freakishly tiny bed.” 

She laughed, but cuddled up obediently, letting his hands on her skin lull her to sleep. 

In the morning, they slipped their rings onto chains around their neck for safe keeping before heading back to the ship. The flight back to the temple was full of stolen kisses. Little did they know just how short their happiness would be. 

Just over a month later they would be separated. For the next five years. 

——————-

Cala looked up from the holo to her mother, biting her lower lip. Tears sparkled in her eyes. “Did you know?”

Poppy shrugged, sitting beside her. “I knew it would end. And I knew it would be ugly. But...I didn’t know that it would be him.” Her daughter looked shocked. “Darling, you can be sweet as syrup..sometimes. But you also have a fiery temper. You used to punch that boy all the time, remember? The darkness...it was in you too. I wasn’t sure who would be the one to turn. But...yes. I knew I’d be nursing someone through a broken heart.”

“Then why did you let it happen? Why did you marry us?”

“Because not having a ring wouldn’t have protected your heart, darling.” She sighed. “And I was hoping I was wrong.” She paused. “Telling you about the prophecy wouldn’t have changed it happening.”

“Prophecy?” The blonde raised an eyebrow at her mother. “I didn’t know anything about a prophecy.”

“It’s confusing. Two that are one, light and dark, all that. But the basics say that two equals in the Force will be bonded. And one will go to the dark, the other the light. They are the other’s only chance of their side winning. Seems like a bunch of crap…and honestly I wasn’t sure it was you until he left.”

Cala bit her lip. “I can do this. Right?”

Her mother nodded. “You’ll get him back. I hope.”

Poppy stroked her daughter’s hair until she slipped into a much needed nap. 

A knock hours later prompted Cala sit up, confused and quickly wipe the remnants of her tears as Poppy beckoned the person to come in. 

Commander Larma D’Acy half-smiled at the pair. “General Organa requests your presence in the control room.”

Cala hoped the smile was a good sign. Maybe Poe wasn't dead.


End file.
